According to Trent:
I was a desperately poor servant boy and I fell into true love with my beautiful charge. I left to find my fortune but my ship was taken by the dread pirate Roberts, (who as we all know does not take prisoners). I came back to find my love engaged to the dickhead prince who had her kidnapped by three mercenaries in order to start a land war. I caught their ship and had to fight the excellent Spanish swordsman, then fist fight 'Andre the Giant' then outwit the Sicilian midget with poison. I saved her life but she did not recognize her true love. In the end I was killed by the merciless six fingered man but not fully and my friends visited 'Miracle Max' or as his friends call him 'the notorious Billy Crystal'. Did it work out in the end? I don't know 'The Princess Bride' fairy tale isn't finished...
According to me:
The fairest of fairies in the land of spices, known as the Princess of Peaches and Cream, was no longer content to sit upon her cinnamon throne, munching on chebekia and couscous. So one night, under the guise of an exotic pole dancer, she escaped with a caravan of gypsies into the hills of saffron and thyme. Together the troupe traveled the world, sometimes by camel, sometimes by mobilette, sometimes by schooner, wherever the wind blew them. Until one day, an evil sea dragon came and swallowed the gypsy's boat, sails and all. The band of gypsies cried out in despair from the dragons belly, but seeing that this did nothing more than upset the dragon's lunch, the princess decided to climb the main mast, scale the massive teeth and tickle the sinus cavity of the sea dragon. With a big sneeze, out she blew, into an orchard of cheery trees. There, lounging in the shade was a handsome man eating a bread bowl of pumpkin soup. He looked up and, enchanted by her sweetness, offered to share his soup. Thus started their fabulous and sometimes pole dancing friendship.
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